Can the Government Help You Make Friends?

I don’t normally read the comments on my social media feeds, but I couldn’t help but notice that my bill to create a new federal office to combat the growing American epidemic of loneliness had attracted some pretty strong reactions from parts of the right wing. Many replies were not suitable for reprint, but one typical post read “He’s going to make all kinds of rules and training programs to ensure you’re socializing properly. This is the nanny state in the extreme.”

I get it. It feels a little strange for the federal government to care about a very personal emotion like loneliness. One headline on my bill read “Chris Murphy Wants to Help You Make Friends.” It’s perfectly legitimate to wonder whether the federal government should be in the business of helping people live more fulfilling social lives, and I accept that my proposal will be viewed by some as an overreach.

But I am convinced there is a spiritual crisis eating away at America today. I believe that Americans are feeling lonelier, more disconnected from community, more frustrated with technology, and more powerless in their economic and family lives than ever before. You see these phenomena manifested in a myriad of national crises, from rising suicide rates to the opioid epidemic to our astronomical gun violence rates. Ignoring the set of anxieties that Americans are dealing with today is a mistake, and risks our policies being mismatched to the actual problems that citizens and families are facing.

When it comes to loneliness, there is just no doubt that something is different today than decades ago. Recent data has shown that more than half of U.S. adults are considered lonely, with a startling 61% of young adults reporting feeling lonely ‘frequently’ or ‘almost all the time.’ And there is no doubt that loneliness has real practical impacts. The Surgeon General’s Advisory on Loneliness detailed some of these adverse health outcomes, including a nearly 30% increased risk for premature death, a 29% increased risk of heart disease, a 32% increased risk of stroke, and an increased risk for anxiety and depression. Feelings of aloneness can also drive people to seek connection and meaning in dark, dangerous places. Undoubtedly, the January 6th rioters and the racist mob in Charlottesville were made up of angry, isolated individuals seeking identity in divisive, hateful movements. 

But most significantly, there is also no question that public policy has played a role in these increasing rates of social isolation. Our failure to regulate social media has caused millions of teenagers (and adults) to disappear into their phones, withdrawing from more healthy, in-person social connections. Our decision to put a few guardrails on the growth of online commerce has hollowed out our local business districts, destroying the healthy small and medium-sized downtowns where many social connections used to be made. And the erasure of local newspapers and journalism has robbed us of the ability to learn about our neighbors and grow our sense of connection to our community.

My legislation would establish a national Office of Social Connection Policy. This office would work across federal agencies to develop effective strategies to improve the quality of life and well-being of our communities and issue national guidelines for social connection similar to existing guidelines on sleep, nutrition, and physical activity. It would also provide funding for the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC) to better understand the epidemic of social isolation and loneliness.

I don’t believe this is “the nanny state in the extreme.” I think the government has made a lot of poor choices over the last fifty years that have pulled America apart. We care less about each other. We live in silos. We feel powerless, searching for meaning and identity. None of this happened by accident. It was policy choices by the government that has unspooled American life, pitting us against each other unnecessarily. And only by calling out this policy that has weakened community, family, and personal agency will we be able to put American spiritual life back on firm footing. That’s what the Office of Social Connection Policy can help achieve – a reckoning with the policies that have spiked loneliness rates and a path to do better.